She carried me into the bedroom. The bed was covered in lilies, a yellowcarpet that smelled clean and fresh and inviting. She laid me down amongthem and began to take off her clothes. I'd have to find out how she'darranged this, but that was a question for later. Now, no more questions.# # #Morning brings with a different clarity. The evening speaks in shadowsand candlelight. The shapes that loom large then are revealed assomething else when the sun banishes illusion. I looked at myself in themirror. My lipstick was smeared. I looked like a tart. I'd fallen asleepwith the necklace on. The marks it left when I removed it just now lookedlike brands, a collar. And the lilies - face it. She'd had my apartmentbroken into. I knew what was happening. The engineer in me was incontrol. The part of me that liked lists, weighed alternatives, andassigned values had the tiller. Last night I had played a princess. No,the engineer would accept no falsehoods. I was a princess last night. Iwas no. Then he pulled out of me and stood up. I couldn't believe it when he stood there and started pissin' on me!"He peed on you?" Shanika was incredulous."Shit, yeah," replied Nydia. "And it burned like hell where he'd been whuppin' me with that switch. He had another girl take me and hose me off. That was the worst I ever got while I was there. The club wouldn't let 'em do much more than that."Now the van picked up speed. They must be on the interstate now, thought Shanika."How come you're going back, then?" she asked."Well, you ain't gonna believe this, girl," Nydia said, "the money's good and all that, but sometimes at night I be thinkin' about that time that white man whupped me and fucked me and I's just some nigger bitch to him. I think about that and my coochie starts to tingle and I gets to playin' with it... I can't explain it, but I want to go back and feel that way again. I can't tell nobody, but I got off on bein' a nigger for the white man."Shanika felt a wetness between her.
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